Episode 102
Unveiling Family Dynamics in the Digital Age with Erin Quinn-Kong -102
On today’s episode we get to chat with Erin Quinn-Kong, a longtime magazine editor who started writing fiction after having her second child, while she was a freelance writer. She started writing Hate Follow in December 2020 after unsuccessfully querying a women’s fiction novel. She knew this idea was different as it had such a solid, newsworthy hook: an influencer who gets sued by her teen daughter for invasion of privacy (something Erin swears is going to happen one day—probably soon!)
Currently managing editor of Texas Highways, Erin has also been an editor at Austin Monthly, Us Weekly, and Allure. As a magazine editor, Erin has watched social media and influencers change the publishing industry and our society as a whole, almost without anyone realizing it. Along with examining social media and whose story parents are allowed to tell online, the mother-daughter struggle in Hate Follow is something that all parents will relate to. New York Times bestselling author Amanda Eyre Ward calls Hate Follow "a rich and witty story with two complicated women at its heart.” She adds, “Quinn-Kong's story of an influencer mom sued by her resentful daughter is of the moment, but its exploration of female power and privilege is timeless. It’s a beautiful debut."
Erin is a member of WFWA and the Writer’s League of Texas. When she’s not working or writing, you can find Erin exploring Texas and beyond with her husband and two kiddos. They love to eat good food, roller skate, swim, and burn all the kids’ energy off at every playground they can find. Erin is also part of a writing group called The Still Writing Squad, four mom writers who came together after years of not having publishing success and quickly found agents and published novels—three of which debuted in 2024. You can get a peek into their group on their Substack, The (Writing) Group Chat.
You can learn more about Erin on her website www.erinquinnkong.com and follow her on Instagram @erinquinnkongwrites -which will be the best place find out about her next novel.
Support your local bookstore & this podcast by getting your copy of Hate Follow at Bookshop.org
A little about today's host-
Author and musical composer Kathleen Basi is mother to three boys and one chromosomally-gifted daughter. Her debut novel, A SONG FOR THE ROAD, follows a musician on an unconventional road trip. Bestselling author Kerry Anne King writes, “In a novel filled with music, heartbreak, and surprising laughter, Basi takes us on a journey that encompasses both unimaginable loss and the powerful resilience of the human heart.”
Meaty, earnest, occasionally humorous, and ultimately uplifting, Kathleen’s fiction highlights the best within ourselves and each other. She writes monthly reflections on life, writing and beauty on her newsletter. Subscribe at https://kathleenbasi.substack.com/.
Be sure to follow or subscribe to Author Express wherever you listen to podcasts and to follow us on Instagram @AuthorExpressPodcast
Learn more about our hosts, the guests we've had, and their books -
Transcript
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Kathleen Basi [:Welcome to Author Express. Thanks for checking us out. This is the podcast where you give us 15 minutes of your time, and we give you a chance to hear the voice behind the pages and get to know some of your favorite writers in a new light. I'm one of your hosts, Kathleen Bassey. I'm an award winning musical composer, feature writer, essayist, and, of course, storyteller. Let me tell you a little about today's guest. Erin Quinn Kong writes book club fiction that spotlights real life issues and how they affect women and their families. Her debut novel, Hate Follow, is about Whitney Golden, an influencer in Austin, Texas who gets sued by her teenage daughter, Mia, for invasion of privacy.
Kathleen Basi [:The book explores whose story parents are allowed to tell and how this generation of kids may revolt when they realize their entire lives have been shared online without their consent. A New York Times best selling author, Amanda Ira Ward, calls hate follow a rich and witty story with 2 complicated women at its heart. Erin, welcome to Author Express. It's so great to have you.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:Thank you so much for having me.
Kathleen Basi [:That's such an interesting story, but we'll get to that. But let's start where we always start. We wanna know what is the most interesting thing about where you are from?
Erin Quinn-Kong [:I was born in Columbia, Missouri, which I know is where you are right now.
Kathleen Basi [:I forgot that. I think I knew that at one time, but I forgot.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:Yeah. Yeah. And then we moved when I was 7 to California for a few years and then moved back to Springfield, Missouri. So I, I mean, I'm a Missouri girl, and so I say, like, I'm from Springfield.
Kathleen Basi [:Mhmm.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:And the most interesting thing about that is I went to the same high school as Brad Pitt.
Kathleen Basi [:Hi. Yes.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:So he is 18 years older than me. So he graduated the year I was born, but he started getting really big when I was in high school. And I remember Legends of the Fall was kind of his first big breakout when he was, you know, the hot guy. So one of the entertainment shows bought a bunch of his yearbooks from us, and I was in journalism. And so we all got new computers Oh. Because of him.
Kathleen Basi [:That's awesome. Yeah. What a great story. That's way better than Brad Pitt went to Mizzou, which is here in Columbia, but he did not graduate. And so that's all I have say about it. Your story is much better.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:I also went to Mizzou, but yes.
Kathleen Basi [:Very cool. Okay. What year did you graduate? May I ask?
Erin Quinn-Kong [:Yeah. 2002.
Kathleen Basi [:2002. So just a few years. You were coming in as I was leaving, this it sounds like. Okay. Cool. Alright. So now that we've had a bit of a of a stroll down memory lane Yeah. Let's find out a little bit more about you.
Kathleen Basi [:In Springfield, growing up, who was your best friend?
Erin Quinn-Kong [:My best friend was a girl named Jenna, and we were together all the time. I remember in, like, 7th grade. So we had junior high in Springfield. So 7th 8th grade, and that's when everything just really got a lot bigger. And she was not in elementary with me, but I met her in 7th grade, and we just became inseparable through junior high and up through high school. We're still Facebook friends. She last I heard, she was in the Netherlands and had a little girl and was married. So yeah.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:And I think she's a lawyer.
Kathleen Basi [:Very cool.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:Yeah.
Kathleen Basi [:It's really great when you have those friendships that last through time. It's there's something really precious about that.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:Yeah. And even though I'm sure we'll talk about social media and kind of the perils, it is cool. Like, we have messaged and talked to each other, and that would never have happened without social media.
Kathleen Basi [:Absolutely. And I have 2 really good, high school friends that I'm still in contact with, and both of them actually are in medical professions and probably will listen to this episode. And I'm constantly asking them whatever medical questions I have for my book. I'm like, hey, it's me again. Can I ask you another question? That they're great about it.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:Yeah. That's cool.
Kathleen Basi [:I love to ask this question, although everybody finds it hard. What's something about you that other people find hard to believe?
Erin Quinn-Kong [:It's interesting now, you know, I've had this long career in magazines, but I'm still a Midwestern girl at heart. So, like, even though I worked in New York City for 6 years and I met celebrities and all that, I'm still I don't know. I'm very Midwestern. I even posted on Facebook the other day, like, oh, if you wanna buy my book, you can preorder. And I was like, but I'm trying not to be annoying. And someone wrote me and said, be annoying. You wrote a book. You know? I just am so Midwestern, and I don't even realize sometimes that, like, what I've accomplished is unusual, you know, or different, I guess.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:Not unusual, but just different. I just it's a very Midwestern thing that I don't know if I'll ever fully understand, but that's something I've noticed lately. People are, you know, with having to publicize my book, I have contacts that, you know, just friends I met 20 years ago who work at today.com. And Wow. To me, that doesn't seem unusual even though it is, I guess.
Kathleen Basi [:That's quite unusual. I would think it's also a very great boon for you, and I have to echo everybody else, be annoying. I mean, don't be like, annoying, but it's a big deal to get that. And you should definitely take advantage of all of your connections that you can. Right. So let's talk about this book, hate follow. Normally, I would ask people to give a description, but we did that in the your bio. So let's just dive right in.
Kathleen Basi [:I started as a mommy blogger. That was my first writing. And so there came a point where I had to stop blogging because I realized that the kids were getting too old, and I couldn't tell the stories anymore. Now I will say that my kids really enjoy now these ridiculous stories that will come up on my memories or whatever that I can find on my blogs, and they'll laugh at things that happened when they were kids. But it does. There reaches a point where you just can't do it anymore. So this is very resonant for me, I guess. So I guess I'd kinda like to know where this idea came from for you.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:Well, first of all, I think that's fascinating. I did not know that about you. Yeah. Very cool. So like I said, I was in magazines my whole career. And so I started probably in 2,008, started watching these how I was always watching, like, health and fitness bloggers.
Kathleen Basi [:Mhmm.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:And when I left New York City, I was a freelancer in Austin for a few years, and I pitched self magazine a story about these bloggers. And I interviewed some of them, and they have since gone on to become kind of micro influencers. But that was my first time that I was like, oh, there's this new kind of industry creeping up. And then, you know, I've I met my husband. I got married. I had kids. So then as you're kind of going along in life, you're watching these people who are now on Instagram, and they're posting their birth stories. I was obsessed with birth stories.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:I, you know, saw all the wedding stuff, like, you know, how to pick your decorations and do all of that. And so then I had children, and my youngest was had just turned 2 and everything shut down with the pandemic. Mhmm. And that's when I think things started getting a little weird. People started sharing so much. And I had started writing in 2019. I wrote a book knowing nothing, and I queried it and everything and did not get an agent. And then I had this idea because even then, I was like, there are people sharing so much about their kids.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:And also in the book, the woman, Whitney, becomes very well known because her husband passes away. And that is a thing. There's quite a few women who have had these wonderful lives and have been influencers, and then their husband dies, and it becomes kind of their thing. And so then I remember thinking there were some of the kids were about preteens. And I was like, what are they gonna think when they see their dad all over in a few years and they're kind of old enough to understand? And then I thought, you know, whose story is that? Is that the wife's story? Is that the kids' story? Is it nobody's story?
Kathleen Basi [:Well and you can understand too at the particularly at the beginning of the pandemic, we were all suddenly aware you don't know what you've got till it's gone. And so I think people overshared. It makes sense to me that people would overshare because everyone was scared and either scared or in denial. And either way, you were you had a strong emotional reaction and a need to fill a gap that you didn't know was being filled before that point. So it makes sense to me.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:Right. And I do think exactly the word overshare, we've put such a premium on that for all different reasons. But even, like, I've noticed, like, people who are trying to start, like, their own business will just post these really personal things, And they're trying to connect and I get it. But it's also like, why do we do that? There's no kind of sense of privacy. And maybe that's okay. And maybe that's how you wanna live. But if you've got children, it just adds a different level of maybe we need to think about this a little bit.
Kathleen Basi [:Yeah. I'm actually really pondering a blog post for another thing that I do called not everything you think needs to be shared. Right? So yeah. That's something I've had to learn.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:Yeah. And I I mean, I could discuss this forever because it is. It's I understand, like, if your husband dies of from cancer, that's horrible, and I understand that sometimes the people you connect with best are online. They understand you know, they're not in your town. They're not your best friend. And so that's valuable, and I understand that. But then there's the flip side, and so I just think it was something worthy of a conversation.
Kathleen Basi [:Is this multiple points of view or is it just from the point of view of the mother?
Erin Quinn-Kong [:Yes. It is. It's multiple. So it's mother daughter back and forth equal share, which was hard.
Kathleen Basi [:Yes. And so my question is, is there one of them that you identify with or root for more strongly than the other?
Erin Quinn-Kong [:So I tried very hard. That was the hardest part of the book for me. When I started writing this, I was fully on the daughter side. And then as I wrote more and I understood the main character, Whitney Moore, and her backstory and why she did this, and I think just as a wife and a mother, you know, as I got more into and just wrote draft after draft. And so at the start, I had several beta readers say, you know, she is not likable. She is not warm enough. And Oh. Then by the end, people have said it's very even.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:I even had agents when I was querying say, oh, I don't understand the daughter Mia at all. And so I was like, okay. Well, at least, you know, there isn't evenness there, but that was my biggest struggle. And now I really can say I mean, another thing is how proud parents are of their kids and how do you I've struggled with this too. How do you not share your children when they're 90% of your life? I mean, they're saying funny things and doing lovely things and you want to share it. It's hard. I mean, it's just a very hard thing we're all dealing with, I think.
Kathleen Basi [:It's a a balance we have to figure out that I think that there's a lot of this the questions around social media use, phone use, and things that are gonna take generations to shake out and really know. I hope that we get better at it. Yeah. So what surprised you most about your writing career starting from magazine going into novels?
Erin Quinn-Kong [:I think what's interesting is how different it is. There I mean, there are similarities, like, you know, I've been an editor for a long time. And so I really enjoyed that process, and I really like talking to my editor. And I think one thing I've honed is kind of knowing what to take and what to leave when someone says, oh, I don't like this and figuring that out. But I also think there's a lot of differences. You know, at the magazine, your stories are obviously a lot shorter. Everything is edited over and over by multiple people. And so by the time it prints, you're just like, oh, that's good.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:And nobody kind of says it's not good. But that's something you know, now with a book, it's kind of just you. It's only your name on it, and then you're getting reviews. And so there are people who'll just be like, oh, I don't like this.
Kathleen Basi [:Mhmm.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:And so that's been really interesting. It definitely feels I just feel more like it's all on my shoulders, which it is, versus a magazine where you're kind of hidden. Nobody not everyone looks at a masthead and knows who's behind the work. So that's been really interesting for me and something I've had to I mean, I need to grow a thicker skin a little bit, I think, about reviews.
Kathleen Basi [:I think all of us do. So if people want to come and find more about your book, hate follow, or your magazine writing, where's the best place for them to go?
Erin Quinn-Kong [:Probably Instagram. It's @erinquinnkongwrites is my little handle, and it's all one word.
Kathleen Basi [:Okay. Very good. How very appropriate that a person who write you about social media clearly knows her stuff. So, tell me what book or story is inspiring you the most these days.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:Well, so I'm working on, you know, a second project, trying very hard to juggle all of that. And I've been really inspired, you know, just by a lot of the female writers who are ahead of me, so they're on, like, book 5. So a few of them recently, I really love The Sicilian Inheritance by Joe Piazza, who is also a journalist. And that one is about the main character. It's dual point of view, and it's, dual timeline, but the main character in present day is, she cuts meat. And so it was very interesting. She's a butcher. And so it's very interesting.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:I think just the details of that were so interesting, and I was like, oh, it would be really cool to just spotlight a career we don't hear about very much.
Kathleen Basi [:Mhmm.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:And then I started reading Margo's Got Money Troubles by Ruthie Thorpe, and that is a very interesting book. She goes back and forth. Like, sometimes the character is talking to the reader, and sometimes it's 3rd person. And I so I'm just very inspired by all of this boldness. I think when you're debut, you just wanna get published and you just wanna get an agent. Right? And now I'm like, okay. I've done this. Like, let's be bold.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:I just wanna be bold. That's what I'm trying.
Kathleen Basi [:Wow. I love that. What a great way to end. So be bold, everyone.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:Yes.
Kathleen Basi [:Erin, thank you so much for being on Author Express today.
Erin Quinn-Kong [:Thank you for having me. This was great.
Kathleen Basi [:Thanks for joining us today. Reviews help other people to find us, so please take a minute to give us a rating and leave a few words. We'll be here again next Wednesday. In the meantime, follow us on Instagram at author express podcast to see who's coming up next. Don't forget. Keep it express, but keep it interesting.
